I Brought Home A Boy

May 5th, 2010 | 47 comments


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When most people come back from abroad, they bring home souvenirs, receipts, admission tickets, a tan and maybe even an extra 10 pounds. I, on the other hand, brought home a boy. He lived in Queens before moving to Boston for work. I live in Brooklyn. We are both New Yorkers but we had to go half way around the world to find each other. Ironic.

Life before studying abroad in Shanghai consisted of school and work. Life after studying abroad consisted of more school and more work. Way to live, right? It wasn’t until I left the States and got my nose out of the books that realized there was more to life than these four walls. Living abroad was the first time I really had a life because as far as I could remember, life was always school and work.

The time I spent abroad was also the time I met my first and only boyfriend. If I hadn’t gone abroad, I’d probably be the only 20-something year old girl who never had a boyfriend. Sad but true and I would probably be too busy not having a life to care.

Traveling gave me a chance to live and it removed this filter I had over my eyes. I saw things clearer. I understood things better. I became happier. I felt livelier. I use to see the corner office as something to strive for but now, I see that I would only be settling. Aside from bringing home a boy from my travels, I also brought home a new me.

What have you brought back from abroad?

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  • http://www.vagabondquest.com/ Dina VagabondQuest

    Same with you! I met Ryan (husband and traveling partner) when we went to Japan for a year exchange student program. I'm from Indonesia, and he's from Canada. Geographically, we were 12 hours time zone difference, right in the other side of the earth. From so faraway places, yet we met in about our middle point, Tokyo. I don't know how otherwise I will ever meet him, I'm so lucky!

  • jenlaceda

    I went to New York to party, met a boy and got married in City Hall 3 years later. The marriage lasted 1 month. I love New York, though!

  • http://www.twenty-somethingtravel.com Stephanie

    I've dated around a bit at home and even had relationships, but when I go abroad my prospects shoot up dramatically! I have this theory I'm much hotter outside the US. I did scoop up a boy while living overseas once, but unfortunately he was British and they don't let you just take those home!

    I'm hoping for better luck this time around!

  • http://www.journeyjournalist.com Gerard Ward

    Better than bringing a trinket or t-shirt home!
    Travel offers us so much more, as you've found out. It's an amazing journey to go on, but it really makes a difference when you're somewhere new and allowing new things (or people) to come into your life. Congrats on finding someone! I'm in France living with my girlfriend I met in Melbourne when she was over for a few months. Funny how life works out that way…

  • http://www.flickr.com/photos/jonnywhitlam/ Jonny Whitlam

    I had completely the same experience living abroad in Copenhagen, Denmark. It absolutely shifted my views on life and reorganised my priorities, though I have to say I had the opposite experience relationship-wise, my girlfriend back home wasn't so impressed with my swanning off to Scandinavia! Still, before that my entire life was my degree, living somewhere else and trying so many new things was definitely the best thing I've ever done, I have to say other than a few christmas presents, cheesy as it is, bringing back a whole new mindset was the best souvenir for me.

  • http://www.baconismagic.ca Ayngelina

    What a romantic story. I've had a few flings but they often end when we both part ways for another city, although we still keep in touch.

    What's interesting about travel is that it opens your mind to new people, those you may not have met or considered back at home. With each person you learn and grow a little bit more.

  • http://www.MyBeautifulAdventures.com/ GlobalButterfly

    Beautiful!!! I've had quite the luck finding my bf's around the world as well. I think it's because we are more open to everything when we travel. I wish you and he the best of luck in life and in love. :)

  • http://www.candicedoestheworld.com Candice

    Damn! How cool is that? Also, you would definitely not be the only 20-something girl who's never had a boyfriend, hahaha. *raises hand*

  • http://www.wild-about-travel.com/ Simon

    What a lovely story, Monica. I can even not imagine a beautiful girl as you are not having experienced love, which is the most beautiful experience in life, together with having children.
    What I most liked in your post is the end: you brought back a 'new me'. That's why traveling is such a wonderful experience, because in a way or the other if you are a sensitive person you cannot be back the same.

  • vegemitevix

    Awww nice story! I'm considerably ahem, older than you, but I found me a second husband on my travels. I bumped into my Englishman in Paris and now live with him in the UK. I reccommend travelling, you never know what you'll learn about yourself, or what you'll find!

  • monica530

    Hot! Guys with accents get extra brownie points. Sounds like you've got yourself a little charming travel tale yourself. ;)

  • monica530

    Aw, you're so sweet Simon. :) I find that every time I travel, a little bit of me changes for the better. That's why I always want to travel. I want to be the best person I can be. I think everyone should strive to be a better person today than they were yesterday.

  • monica530

    Haha…aww! Are you telling me you've never had a boyfriend?! We're going to have to remedy this!

  • monica530

    Thanks Andrea! A cutie like you I'm sure you've had a few boyfriends. ;) We are opened to more things when we travel but I also think it's because we have this one big similar interest that connects us – traveling.

  • monica530

    Traveling definitely has allowed me to meet people I normally wouldn't have thought I had anything in common with. All the cliques and stereotypes seem to evaporate because when people travel, there really isn't a mold to fit in to.

  • monica530

    That is so very true. A new mindset is irreplaceable. I can imagine how hard it must have been for your girlfriend with you being away. But at the same time if she didn't share the same passion you have for traveling, it would be difficult for her to understand why you need to travel. Perhaps you'll find someone who shares that passion with you in future when you're on the road.

    Are you traveling right now? Or are you still working on your degree?

  • http://www.vagabondquest.com/ Dina VagabondQuest

    That's cute :)

  • monica530

    Thanks Gerard! I think because my boyfriend and I share this passion for traveling, we also have a similar mindset. Although there are plenty of things we disagree on, we're still together after 2+ years.

    I hope you and your girlfriend are happy and well. How long have you been together?

  • monica530

    Haha! I wonder if we ladies emit different endorphins or something because of our excitement of traveling. Maybe that might explain your their of increased prospects abroad. Lol

    Best of luck finding someone special. But you know it's a Murphy's Law that you never find what you're looking for until you stop looking – like your keys for example.

  • monica530

    Aww…I'm sorry it didn't last but I'm glad you don't have a bad impression of New York City. People say that it's hard to find love in the Big Apple. I don't know how much of that is true. I never really dated. I spend most of my quality time during nights and weekends with my books.

  • monica530

    Aww! I'm not the only one. You have quite a romantic story yourself. Going half way across the world to find your significant other. We're both lucky ladies. :D

  • kirstenalana

    Oh I loooove this. For so many reasons!!

  • http://www.vagabondquest.com/ Dina VagabondQuest

    Indeed :D

  • http://www.mumsgoneto.blogspot.com/ Trish @ Mum's Gone to

    Who said holiday romances can't work! I too found a lovely boy when I was abroad – a gorgeous one from Edinburgh. So good to read your story as I've only just told everyone mine too – hence the twittering last night!

  • http://www.candicedoestheworld.com Candice

    Hahaha, trust me, the dating scene in this city is GRIM.

  • http://foxnomad.com Anil

    Awww, that's cute!

  • brittaniphotography

    =)

    Great story. Where all have you traveled?
    Hope you two have many more trips together in the future.

  • http://www.stayadventurous.wordpress.com/ craig zabransky

    First off that is an amazing sunset photo. and second….well, do we now know who wears the boxers?

    great story, honest and brave. best wishes and….
    stay adventurous,
    Craig

  • http://twitter.com/darrickjlee Darrick J Lee

    First, nice story and I'm happy for you.
    Second, where were you during all my travels ;-P
    In the past decade that I've been traveling for my own selfish pleasure, I've only met a handful of people who enjoy traveling as much as I do, and even fewer single ladies who like traveling. But I have heard romantic tales of couples traveling around the world and falling in love. I've yet to be so fortunate, but I smile everytime I hear those tales and wonder what adventures, traveling will bring.
    Everytime I meet people, I learn something and it becomes a part of me. Just like I am a part of all that I have met, I am a part of where I have traveled and those places become me.

    I read this earlier, but I was too busy on a travel to respond. I just came back from 4 day adventure to Los Angeles and a 3 day conference at the National Harbor in Maryland. I met some wonderful new people in LA and made a mental checklist of places to visit and things to try when I return. I renewed friendships and met familiar faces at the conference while enjoying the wonderful scenery of the waterfront. I prefer traveling in small groups than traveling alone and try to arrange group trips to places, but that's often hard to schedule. Traveling with new people often brings a different perspective and reminds you of the things you take for granted.
    I had forgotten that traveling is a different experience and requires a different mindset. I instinctively stock and pack small bottles into ziplock bags and leave them on the outside of my unlocked luggage. I forgot not everyone packs that way and some people are still unaware of flight rules. I bundle pack and follow the one bag principle, even though I usually check in my luggage. With airline companies charging for extra bags, everyone tries to bring everything on board, which leads to longer security lines, and planes running out of carryon space, which results in bags being checked anyways. I throw every metallic object into my bag to speed up security scans and figure out the most effecient way to travel. I always write off the whole day for travel so I can jump on any free upgrades on overbooked flights. I always bring some disposable reading material to pass along or leave behind at the destination. I've learned to shop as if I'm traveling and prefer buying smaller portable stuff, even when I'm not expecting to travel… which is all part of that traveling mindset. I've learned how to shop for flights and seek out coupons and deals. I've learned to not bring back useless junk, but focus on people and priceless experiences. I've learned to haggle and barter on the streets and I've learned when to pay with cash, and when to pay with plastic. I've learned to sleep anywhere and wake at a moments notice. I've learned to be aware of my surroundings – (pilots call it situational awareness) and learned to watch people as well as the scenery. I've learned how to find cheap local cuisine and I've learned to compromise on decisions…

    But most importantly, I've learned to have fun…

    Reminds me of the Dr Seuss poem, oh the places you'll go… http://www.teamhope.com/seuss.htm

  • http://www.noplacetobe.com Poi

    I'm hoping to find love on my travels and ditch Kirsty…..

  • monica530

    Thanks Kirsten! Hope you find a little romance in your travels as well. ;)

  • monica530

    Aww…that is really sweet. I'm glad you found someone too and I hope you both have wonderful and romance travel adventures together. :)

  • monica530

    We've traveled to a lot of places in China. We've also traveled to Madrid and Istanbul. If you want to read more about those travels, you can find them here: http://www.apairofpantiesandboxers.com/where-iv...

    Thanks for stopping by Brittani!

  • kirstenalana

    Ahhhh romance…..I do seem to find it on many of my travels!! The
    first trip to NYC was full of it, and my recent trips to Mexico and
    Savannah were as well. It all depends on the company or (if traveling
    alone) who you end up meeting on the road!

    Does make for a rich experience though ;-)

    So…the post didn't make it clear. Is this boy you brought home still
    around? Or was that a short lived experience?

    LOOOOOOOVED the sunrise post!! Thanks for including me!! (I'll have to
    update my bio a little now that I know if it NYC I am moving to!!)

    Feliz Friday!
    :-) Kirsten

  • monica530

    Lol – I prefer panties but sometimes I like to wear boxers over my panties.

  • monica530

    Hey Darrick! Thanks for the taking the time to leave such a thoughtful comment. I know there is a special lady waiting for you out there and you'll find her when you least expect it. It's kind of like looking for your keys. You go nuts trying to figure out where it might be and you almost never find it in time but when you stop looking for it, it just suddenly appears.

    It sounds like you have your own travel adventures too. I think maybe you should start a blog so I can follow you when I'm not traveling. ;)

    You've got a good mindset when it comes to traveling. I should incorporate some of it into my travels too. I hope your future travels take you far and wide and I sincerely hope that you find you're lucky lady.

    P.S. I'm not joking when I say you should start your own travel blog. :)

  • monica530

    Haha – maybe Kirsty is going to find love on her travels first so she could ditch you!

  • http://travelerahoy.wordpress.com Alouise

    I'm not one for romantic stories but that was really cute. I can't say I've brought back anything as exciting as a boy. Probably the best thing I've brought back is a desire to go back out and travel.

  • monica530

    Oh! I've brought that travelbug back with me too and I'm so glad I did!

  • http://twitter.com/darrickjlee Darrick J Lee

    heh, well i have a travel log of sorts, but its not quite setup and i have to decide which cms to use or find time to dig up the one i wrote years ago…
    i also need to catch up on this weeks adventures… so much to do… and so little time… new job which has lots to do, gotto plan for an upcoming family reunion at our house which means lots of prepping for it…
    but i do hav a semi written log of my adventures… and pictures… :-D
    u should start a travel tips page… and start posting things uve found helpful… an idea ive been meaning to do…

  • http://www.beatravelbee.com Joya

    I'm so happy you met someone abroad. I always hope that will happen to me when I travel but not yet. What I love about travel is relationships like that can pop up when you least expect it. Thanks for sharing this sweet story!

  • gerardward

    We met back in August '09 when she was in Melbourne for three months. Then it was a difficult seven month wait when she left in September, but since arriving in France for her, it's been absolutely worth every minute. :)

  • http://twitter.com/darrickjlee Darrick J Lee

    wouldnt it be great if two of your twitter followers met on a travel somewhere and fell in love? :-D that would be a cool story…

  • monica530

    Thanks Joya! You never find something that you're looking for until you stop looking for it. Kinda like your keys. Lol So if you're looking for romance abroad, maybe you should stop and let it come looking for you. ;) That's what happened to me. Getting a boyfriend in Shanghai wasn't even on my mind.

  • monica530

    Haha! That would be awesome if I was cupid/matchmaker. Should we start with you? Lol!

  • http://www.ournewoffice.com Sara

    What a sweet tale. I want to know more! I see the beginnings of a novel or a short story.

  • Jonny Whitlam

    Sorry I missed this reply, still finishing the degree – 6 days to go! Very exciting! She did share the passion a bit, but we're at different places in our lives, these things happen. Plan to travel a lot of Europe again this Summer. Hope all is well for you!